Tuesday, January 20, 2009

This I Believe

Staying on the topic of "kids say the darnedest things," I heard a great installment of "This I Believe" on NPR the other day from 7-year-old named Tarak McLain. Now I was expecting something like "I believe that Hannah Montana is awesome" (which, by the way, she is), but instead I got these 30 gems:

I believe life is good.
I believe God is in everything.
I believe we’re all equal.
I believe we can help people.
I believe everyone is weird in their own way.
I believe hate is a cause for love.
I believe that when I meditate I feel peaceful.
I believe we should be generous.
I believe brothers and sisters should be kind to each other.
I believe kids should respect their parents.
I believe I should not whine.
I believe people should wake up early.
I believe people should go outside more.
I believe in nature.
I believe people should use less trees.
I believe we should help the Arctic and rainforest animals.
I believe people shouldn’t throw litter on the ground.
I believe people should not smoke.
I believe God is in good and bad.
I believe in magic.
I believe people should not give up.
I believe love is everywhere.
I believe that God helps us to have a good time.
I believe we live best in a community.
I believe we can protect people in danger.
I believe we should help the poor.
I believe its OK to die but not to kill.
I believe war should not have started.
I believe war should stop.
I believe we can make peace.

Now obviously young Tarak is a happy, energetic youth who's excited and optimistic about the future and that colors a lot of what he has put forward here. Being a bit older, and far more cynical and jaded, I thought I'd share my version of 30 things I believe:

I believe religion is the opiate of the masses
I believe religion is losing out to TV
I believe my dog is cooler than your dog
I believe under ripe bananas are disgusting
I believe Jennifer Aniston is way overrated
I believe coffee tastes best all the time
I believe moldy bread is ok as long as you cut off the moldy parts (the large ones at least)
I believe a cheeseburger with ketchup is the great American meal
I believe college is overpriced
I believe breast implants are among the worst inventions ever
I believe teachers should be paid like professional athletes
I believe bad teachers need to be fired... now
I believe doing dishes is the doorway to enlightenment
I believe marijuana should be legal
I believe Cheesecake Factory gives you way too much food
I believe Guns 'n Roses is nothing without Slash
I believe breakfast is the best meal of the day
I believe not all my Facebook "friends" are really friends
I believe babies are not all they're cracked up to be
I believe Intel makes better processors
I believe TBS is very funny
I believe Ethiopian coffees are the best combination of quality and price
I believe queue theory should be taught in high school
I believe Blu-ray is well worth the upgrade
I believe churches should pay property taxes
I believe Mario Brothers is head and shoulders above Sonic the Hedgehog
I believe skinny jeans on men are ridiculous
I believe "I'm With Busey" was cancelled by mistake
I believe cigarettes are cool
I believe there is life on other planets